That is probably a really ridiculous title. As you can see, I'm not that fat. I'm 'slightly obese'. According to science, I should be 165. That's probably right.
I wanna talk about something. And I'm being a total hypocrite here. I learned something this summer: that in order to successfully go through with this process, I need to love the body I already have. Well not love, but I definitely need to accept it. And so far, I have begun to tolerate the flabs and the rolls of fat. I've completely embraced my bodacious backside (lol) and my voluptuous bust. And my face; I couldn't ask for a more unique face.
Now what do I want to be? Or rather who do I want to be? Physically, I'd like to be able to wear anything in my closet without worrying that I look fat in this outfit or that these jeans are getting too tight. I'd like to put on my panties and not view love handles poring over my panty line. I'd like to be able to wear my shorts, having no care in the world of my thighs jiggling out of proportion. I don't want to be fit for reasons like, I want boys to think I'm hot or because So-and-so thinks I'm fat. I want to do this for myself. I want to love my body and love and skin I'm in. I'm done hiding in my clothes, ashamed of my figure. When I look in the mirror I want to think 'wow, I look great!' rather than 'damn, I look like shit'. I don't want to be self-conscious.
What type of girl do I want to be? Well. I'll get into that in another post.
On another note, I've come across an amazing idea. Credit to Miss Apricot-Tea, whom I'm currently obsessed with. If you haven't noticed she influenced this blog a good deal. Hell, my background is from her blog, I just adjusted it a bit. She took on this wonderful project in which she took a picture every single day for 365 days. I thought, what the hell? And there above you have Picture 1. I quite like it. I also chose this picture to display exactly why I feel I need to lose weight.
Speaking of Miss Apricot-Tea, I wanna say this: She is everything I want to be. Open-minded, compassionate, brutally honest, down to earth, amazing skin, a vegetarian, in shape, married at a young age, and most of all COMFORTABLE WITH WHO SHE IS. *Sigh*
On the events of today, My mother, my sister and I went to the movies and watched Despicable Me. "It's so FLUFFAY!" It was beautiful. I ate a Grilled Chicken Stuft Burrito. I should be ashamed. But it was one tasty mistake.
posted by loreal @ 5:32 PM